Mountains & Valleys

 “Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer” - Romans 12:12 (ESV)

On the diamond, I began as a catcher, shifted to second base, and eventually ended up in the outfield. I was always the player who really just wanted to play and didn’t have a care in the world of how I achieved the goal. Throughout high school, I was somewhat of a utility man, playing positions all over, but in my final baseball game ever, I ended up at third base, a place I had never been. 

Before I explain, I have to backtrack. The month is May of my senior year of high school, and I am prepping for what, unbeknownst to me, would be one of the most action-packed weeks of my life to that point. On Saturday, I walked across the stage, heard my name called, grabbed my diploma, and graduated. On Sunday, I attended my friend’s graduation parties across the Metro area. On Monday, my dad and I drove to the airport and flew to New York City. We spent the day exploring and living out what we called “free New York”. I promise it is real. The following day, we walked through Times Square, essentially tracing our steps, spent hours prepping in our hotel room, and then made our way to the Jazz at Lincoln Center for the Sports Emmys. We arrived early, intentionally, and then proceeded to experience one of the coolest nights in my entire life. I was too nervous to eat, something I’ve never experienced before, so after the show, my dad and I went to Canes at Times Square. It was already past midnight, but the place was rocking. I sat there, eyes wide, still in complete shock at all that had happened. The next day, I spent on my notes app trying to recall every detail, so that I would never forget. In the airport, I had Ryan Clark, a former NFL player and now Sports Media Personality, come over and say hello to me. It was such a feeling to be easily recognized. We boarded a flight midday and made our way back to Kansas City. I used to be anxious about flying, but I got over it pretty quickly. This time was different. I was flying back to join my team for a playoff game that just happened to be thirty minutes from the airport. If you know Kansas geography at all, this game could have been played at an upwards of three hours from the airport, but it was close enough that I could attempt to pull it off. Our plane flew over the fields as warmups were in full swing. We landed as the first pitch was thrown. We got back to our car as the second inning was beginning, and I arrived in the dugout with my uniform in the middle of the fourth. In High School Baseball the middle of the fourth is the halfway point with only seven scheduled innings to be played. As I was walking up I saw my teammates score two runs, and then when I got to the dugout, and they switched sides, the opposing team scored three. I remember telling myself over and over that I was not a bad luck charm. In baseball, some weird superstitious thoughts mess with you. Throughout those final innings, I watched as each team fought back and forth. Eventually, the game went to extra innings. Each inning, it seemed like one team was about to win the dramatic game, but then somehow the other refused to give up. A good friend of mine, who is also a professional sports writer, happened to be there and said this is his article he wrote about the game: “While that might sound obscure to you, especially if you don’t live in Kansas, the game I saw was one of the most exciting games I’ve ever been to in person.” (You can read his full story here: https://myinsidestory.substack.com/p/never-give-up) My heart rose and dropped at such a rapid pace that I’m sure this game took at least one year off my life. Regardless, I had no control over the situation. I simply cheered from the dugout, as was my job for many big games during the season, as I was used mainly as a utility man on defense and a pinch runner on offense, but then our third baseman went down with an injury. Barring lots of details, for the sake of sounding dramatic, I grabbed my glove and ran out in the bottom of the tenth inning, leading by one. Slowly, but surely, our opponents compiled hits, tying and then eventually moving the tying run into scoring position. I will never forget that next ball. It was hit perfectly between the shortstop and I; neither of us had a play on it. The man on second was already stealing, so he had a great jump on home and scored the winning run. I stood on the field, watching the other team walk it off. 

This really does seem dramatic as I write it, but what was so hard for me was the fact that earlier that morning I had been in Canes in Times Square. Just twenty-four hours ago, I had been getting ready to go to the Emmys, but now I stood on a field watching my last high school baseball game end. It was a Mountain Top Moment to a valley in the quickest fashion I have ever experienced. 

I am young enough that my lived experience is limited, but I do know this will happen again. In reality, it will oftentimes be much worse than a high school baseball game loss. I will experience frustration, insecurity, or even death. The hardest things in my life are still yet to come, but I think that I lived through this moment to give me my baseline. Life can feel like a roller coaster at times, but God is consistent, unchanging, and sovereign. When things are going well, and I don’t have a care in the world, God is sovereign. When things are crashing down, and the world feels like it is ending, God is sovereign. I think the lesson for me in this story is not to get too wrapped up in the current state of things, good or bad. Mountain top or valley low. God is sovereign, and He ultimately has a plan. I would have loved to win that game, but as I still vividly remember the details of that day almost a year later, I am prompted to write this down when my judgment is clouded by the mountain tops and the valley lows. I tend to turn to God when I need him in the valley. Now, my prayer is that I look for Him in the expanse of the land as I sit at the top of a long climb.